Fanaticism, Toilet Seats & Cesar Millan
He Said: I haven't written a damn thing in a while. Between work and playoffs and trying to be the freakin' Dog Whisperer, I have been blogoslippin'. Yeah I just made up that word.
Yeah I am a huge Steeler fan... OK so when it comes down to a blatant holding non-call to steal a playoff win from my beloved five-time World Champion Pittsburgh F'in Steelers I get a little pissed. You Raiders fans know what I'm talkin' about... like that wasn't a fumble in the snow little Tommy Brady. OK so all of you people that aren't football fans bear with me. My point is this (MPIT): All of you guys that even talk to the TV during the game... In the eyes of your wives... you're an absolute fanatic. When you're at the sports bar watching with your boys... you're one of the coolest Mofers in the room. Yes I'm a fanatic and my team absolutely loves me for it.
On to the bathroom stuff... Since when is closing a toilet seat a matter of manners? I prefer to keep bacteria as far away from my toothbrush as possible. To me this is just being clean. As far as all of you guys that keep the lid open... let me share some crap with you (pun fully intended). MPIT: Toilets have lids for a reason. And girls... you're not off the hook either. Putting the toilet seat down doesn't mean just dropping the ring. If you want the seat down just so you don't have to touch it... you're just as wrong. Although!!! All public toilets should not be touched unless you're the one cleaning them! It's simple. It's a toilet. There is function one, function two and not in use. End of story.
When I married my beautiful wife, with me came my cat Reggie. I got her two cats Morley & Lucy. What I hadn't counted on was a new best friend. That's Casey. He's a 3 year old American Staffordshire Terrier. When you're looking in my windows at night, he's a Pitbull. On May 15 he'll be four and the only thing he wants is a Steelers jersey with his name on it... oh yeah, they make 'em. He's a great dog but he could use some balance. We are trying to challenge him more. If any of you know of the Dog Whisperer, you know what I mean. His main philosophy is this: exercise, discipline and affection (in that order). Sometimes it's tough to make the proper time to exercise your dog. He is such a big part of our lives and requires his structure (as we all do). MPIT: I am the pack leader and therefore I must lead my pack.
I will try not leave you all jonesing for new blogstuffs: Like Charger fans waiting for LT to run the damn ball. Like everyone waiting for you to put the damn seat down. Like followers waiting for us to lead the damn pack.
Lay on, Commenters, And damn'd be him that first cries, 'Hold, enough!
Comments
Come on Mr. T--- Tom Terrific did not fumble! "Tuck rule," baby.
I like this blog. I look forward to both sides of the discussion. I hope your attack Staffordshire listens to your whispers. CASEY!! Don't put on that Steelers jersey! I'll send a nice blue Patsies jersey for you.
Posted by: Ben G | January 22, 2008 06:13 PM
Ol-Ba! I'll make sure he's wearing it when we fly our pig to hell for the snowball fight on Feb 30th.
Posted by: He Said | January 23, 2008 05:08 PM
Casey! You don't want to end up looking like the Steeler in the photo. Is that toothless Tatum? Many Steelers fans emulate their heroes...so they're toothless like Tatum or bald like Roscoe P. Coltrane Bradshaw.
Patsies fans emulate their heroes too, so I'm busy with Gisele Bundchen's prettier friend.
I'll be there in a minute Gisele! Gotta go, Tony.
Posted by: Ben G | January 24, 2008 03:36 PM