Hall-o-freakin'-luja! It's Friday! Here are my observations from the past week. Read'em and add your own:

1. I can't stand whistlers. Twice this week I picked a bathroom stall where the gal whistled throughout her business. It was disturbing and very hard for me to concentrate - maybe because I started humming along. It was a duo in the public bathroom.

2. A little turd called Taterbug a "mother effer." Her words to protect my eardrums, not mine. When asked what she did to provoke such a verbal lashing, she assured me that she hadn't done anything but couldn't be confident that her best friend didn't. She further quelled my anger by informing me that she went all "ghetto" on the guy, telling him not to talk back to her or call her names. She then completed her talk with a head bob and a hair flip. I'm so proud.

3. C-dub informed me he is becoming a teenager at the ripe old age of six. He found a pimple on his lip and now he's fearful of growing a mustache.

4. I took the kids on a hike at the rive rbar. When Taters insisted C-dub pack her rocks, he professed his dismay by whining that she was treating him like a "waiter." She laughed, I laughed, and he dropped her rocks.

5. I have OCD and it's recently been kicking in. I had to stop myself from pulling over to the side of the road to zip up a bum's backpack. He was walking with it wide open and it bothered me. ALOT.

6. I got my hair did. Back to blond I go a skippin'.

7. Saturday is Hops in the Park in Fortuna. I'm so excited to spend some girlfriend time at this event and partake amongst some adult beverlies.

8. I lost an entire tree's worth of peaches to the incontinent bastard bear who has been molesting my orchard on a nightly basis. He left me several piles of crap as a thank you gift. What an asshat. This is war.

9. I lost all my strawberries and tomato plants to the fat doe and her two teenager fawns. They were adorable when they were small but not so much now that the spots are gone. They ate all my plants even after my garlic and cat pee spray was applied. I guess they thought it was a specially made vinaigrette.

10. I think I need to stop gardening. Rather than less anxiety and stress of life - it's making it worse by causing me to evaluate which firearm might do the best job at taking my garden and orchard thieves out.

11. I've decided that I've had it when having to buy clothes. I feel too old for the Juniors section but the Misses section has too much lace and polyester. I need an in between section specially designed for self-proclaimed MILFS.

12. It's the final countdown to my Def Leppard and Poison concert. I think I'm gonna do Spandex for it's shapewear abilities. And the fact I'm five hours away from home and no one should know me. I hope.

13. I was informed this week we lost approximately $135K on the value of our home. If you happen to find, it, can you please mail it back to 123 Pissedoffatforeclosuresandshortsales Way, Anytown, CA.

14. My cats have been continuing their murderous spree in our yard. The other night was several disturbingly large crickets. Tonight was a shrieking mole that ran up inside my Dyson vacuum cleaner. Thank God hubby got it out. The thing doesn't get much usage so in reality, the mole coulda lived there for years without being noticed.

15. Have I mentioned that it's Friday? Have a fantabulous day and weekend!