Every once in a blue moon, I get a wee bit 'o Irish in me...much to the gratitude of my Irish husband ;o). Because of our "heritage," I thought I'd honor this holiday by sharing a few jokes and tales with you.

First, here's some jokes I stole off the 'Net:

His wife had been killed in an accident and the police were questioning Finnegan.
"Did she say anything before she died?" asked the sergeant.
"She spoke without interruption for about forty years," said the Irishman.

Q: Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day?
A: Regular rocks are too heavy.

Q: Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun?
A: Because they're always a little short.

Q: Why do leprechauns have pots o'gold?
A: They like to "go" first class!

Q: How can you tell if an Irishman is having a good time?
A: He's Dublin over with laughter!

Q: What's Irish and stays out all night?
A: Patty O'furniture!

Q: How did the Irish Jig get started?
A: Too much to drink and not enough restrooms!

Q: What do you call an Irishman who knows how to control his wife?
A: A bachelor.

Q: What would you get if you crossed Christmas with St. Patrick's Day?
A:St. O'Claus!

Q: Are people jealous of the Irish?
A:Sure, they're green with envy!

Q: What would you get if you crossed Quasimodo with an Irish football player?
A:The Halfback of Notre Dame!

Q: Why did the leprechaun stand on the potato?
A:To keep from falling in the stew!

Q: Do leprechauns make good secretaries?
A:Sure, they're great at shorthand!

Q: How did the leprechaun beat the Irishman to the pot of gold?
A:He took a shortcut!

Q: What do leprechauns love to barbecue?
A:Short ribs!

Q: Why are leprechauns so hard to get along with?
A:Because they're very short-tempered!

"I married an Irishman on St. Patrick's Day."
"Oh, really?"
"No, O'Reilly!"

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Don.
Don who?
Don be puffin' down the Irish now!

Secondly, here's some random facts about today:

* This is what Wikipedia says about it's origin: Saint Patrick's Day (Irish: Lá ’le Pádraig or Lá Fhéile Pádraig),
colloquially St. Paddy's Day or Paddy's Day, is an annual feast day which celebrates Saint Patrick (circa 385–
461 AD), one of the patron saints of Ireland, and is generally celebrated on March 17.

* St. Patrick was born in 385 AD on the west coast of Britain. When he was 16, he was captured and sold into
slavery to a sheep farmer. He escaped when he was 22 and spent the next 12 years in a monastery. In his
30s he returned to Ireland as a Christian missionary. He died at Saul in 461 AD and is buried at Downpatrick.
Sounds like a candidate for a Lifetime Movie Network movie.

* St. Patricks's day was first celebrated in the USA, in 1737. Boston, Massachusetts held the first public
celebration.

* Chicago dyes it's river green. Poor fish.

* McDonald's has a Shamrock shake. Goes great with fries.

* 23 of our US presidents had Irish ancestry.

* 34 million Americans have Irish ancestry. The rest are just lying.

* The Irish flag is green, white, and orange.

* The harp is the symbol of Ireland.

* The legend says that each leaf of the clover means something: the first is for hope, the second for faith, the
third for love and the fourth for luck.

Thirdly, here are some things to consider on Patrick's Day:

* Green food coloring in the toilet bowl is a cute idea (leprechaun pee, get it?). However, it's the gift that keeps
on giving leaving a nice green stain.

* Mommazilla and Hubby like corned beef and cabbage. Kiddos do not. In fact, kiddos make gagging sounds and
run for higher ground when asked to eat this traditional food fair.

* Green beer is great for breakfast or any time of the day for that matter. It totally goes with the concept of
green eggs and ham and I'm sure Dr. Seus would approve.

* Wear green or dye some sort of patch of hair (preferably those hairs exposed to the public). If you do not,
you will be faced with gropes, grabs, and pinches. Unless you plan on hanging out with gorgeous men and
women all day, I'd suggest you protect yourself.

* If you're going to make green beer, color it prior to drinking. Drunk coloring is dangerous and should be avoided.

* And finally, for the adults out there, here's a helpful video full of suggestions for St. Patrick's Day:

Happy St. Patrick's Day!!!