Did you know that Hotwheels cars do this neat spinning, swishy thing as they’re being flushed down the toilet by a two year old? Or, how they tend to only block up sewage lines and septic tanks when you’re getting ready to leave that same day for vacation? And, how nice it is to watch your hubby, dressed in his finest trip attire, “snaking” the clogged drain all the while educating your children on the functions of a septic tank and the importance of “poop soup” (as labeled by the eight year old daughter).

Welcome to my life! The one that doesn’t follow any of the finest child rearing books or lesson plans, because evidently, my own kids have not read them either. I’m a dedicated wife, loving mom to three, and self-proclaimed amateur photographer, cake decorator, genealogist, bargain shopper, and now, blogger. I tend to start hobbies that I never fully learn, hence the title, “amateur” on the previously mentioned titles – I guess I may have commitment problems but I think it’s an issue of “time” rather than “want.” I think any parent can relate; if you can’t perform it one handed, talking on the phone while changing a diaper and cleaning up dog barf, then it’s just not the hobby for you. I figure that I will get my hobbies back about the time I retire!

My family and children are my life providing me with as much fodder as necessary to complete my ramblings. We live a relatively uncomplicated life as working parents and owners of a small, completely worthless farm that we like to call, “Redneck Ranch.” We have three fish, eleven chickens, a one-horned house goat (or so he thinks), three stinky dogs, and several deer, a bear and a bobcat that came free with the house. Our chickens have completely mauled my favorite, beautiful Rhody by claiming it as their roost and our goat loves when new people visit, especially when they have shiny paint jobs that he can see his new friends in (a.k.a. his reflection – not the brightest goat on the block). Needless to say, you need to watch where you step when you hit our driveway.

As far as the kids and hubby go, they’re fairly low maintenance and easy to please. As the saying goes, we “live, laugh, and love” a lot around our household. There are nightly karate tournaments, wedgie sessions, and the all time favorite of, “Who can talk the two year old into doing the naughtiest thing (game)?” It’s a fun place to live, not only for the kids but for the grown-ups as well.

And then there’s me, a 30’ish working mom still trying to figure out what she wants to be when she grows up. What the heck, who cares? Does anyone ever really figure that out? I truly doubt it but I secretly hope that it eventually happens. What you’ll find on my blog are my rants, raves, and observations of my family and friends as well as any other item(s) I think might be helpful to parents, like the occasional bargain – locally or online (like Target and Rite Aid Christmas items are at 75% off, run!!!!). I’m sarcastic by nature and don’t mind making fun of myself or immediate family should the need arise. Just ask my brother, who shed a silent tear when he heard I may become a T-S blogger - he’s been the root of several of my more interesting stories.

So come on in, take a seat, grab a cup of caffeine-loaded liquid (the kind that makes the world seem like a better place), and share some quality time with Mommazilla.