Become a Better Father/Every Day Dad

1. Have SMART goals

2. Have strategies that work-- Make sure your goals are workable, realistic, and actionable.

3. Have good implementation—follow through and be methodical, sequential and incremental. Start small and do not despise the day of small beginnings.

4. Accountability—be accountable to trusted advisors and mentors and those more experienced. Coach and mentor others as well. Hold yourself and others accountable to your goals.

5. Minimize distraction—focus on what’s important—keep the main thing the main thing

6. Commit to your goals and plans—daily review your goals and adjust as needed

7. Communicate your goals, with all stakeholders and family members—don’t do this in a corner.

8. Post written goals publicly—be very public and very accountable and very up front with goals

9. Get family buy in and immediately—kid buying in and commitment to everyone involved. Share what you have in mind with others who play a role in the plans success and achievement.

10. Have daily, weekly, monthly meetings to review goals and progress

11. Develop reasonable implementation schedule and stick to it—calendarize!

12. Do your plans, see what happens, adjust as needed, and keep in touch with those who can help you stay on track. Accountability works great!

13. Evaluate—revisit current goals and paradigms and find what works and what doesn’t. Implement change immediately. If it works. Do not fix it.

14. Think out of the box—creatively brainstorm. Be fearless and try new things. Get feedback from trusted advisors and mentors.

15. Go away—go somewhere way from all distraction and develop a compelling parenting plan.

16. Create a culture of accountability, celebration and clarity—celebrate achievement by awarding team and individual accomplishment. Give public and private encouragement and praise. reward achievement

17. Communicate expectations—have courageous conversations and be clear on expectations. Communicate, communicate, and communicate.

18. Leverage your time and manager prime times of the day—the times where energy is the highest and most focused.

19. Just do it—plan the work and work the plan. Commit to high performance. Kill procrastination and perfectionism. Keep a sense of humor. Learn to grow and change. It back in action and get involved.

20. Dream it, write it down, and just do it--- rediscover your passion, mission and purpose today. You have a choice, time, resources, and ability. Now it’s up to you.

Posted by Scott Hammond at 07:54 PM | Permalink | Comments (999)

Come to find out that our older kids can really break our hearts when they make poor life decisions and even really blow it. I am in the early process of grieving the forfeited possibilities that my dear one has given up due to her less than optimal decisions.
Here are a few steps to consider as you process your broken heart--

1. GRIEVE--Really process the hurt. Talk to trusted advisors, your spouse, and others who have been there and done that.

2. PRAY--Take your hurt to God. He is not surprised. You have hurt Him in like manner and He still gives you His grace and mercy. Can you give the same? You have been forgiven much--now it is your turn to forgive.

3. TALK WITH YOUR CHILD/COMMUNICATE--Have a compelling and courageous conversation. Be open, listen, and DO NOT ATTACK. You are in this to communicate and SHARE FOR THE LONG TERM.

3. HAVE A LONG TERM PERSPECTIVE--You want to know, love, and invest in your kids for a lifetime. Make decisions with this in mind. Take your time. Do not over react, speak with finality, or do what will hurt the relationship irreparably in the long run.

Having your heart rendered in two really sucks. You have a right to be hurt. The key here is to be honest with yourself and others and focus on processing the hurt and then to move on.

4. MOVE ON--You have much at stake and cannot afford to get stuck in yet another drama. You are responsible for others, yourself, and are a steward of perhaps many things. It is key to not neglect these and still be true to your self, hurts, and then be ready to move forward. You will find the Grace if you seek Him with all your heart. I know this...

Posted by Scott Hammond at 08:33 PM | Permalink | Comments (289)

1. SPEAKING SKILLS--It is a must:the ability to accurately communicate and express ideas, concepts, and persuade your family in a compelling manner.

2. MENTORING--Being good at bringing your kids up to their potential in any skill by helping, leading, serving, and coaching.

3. LEADERSHIP--Learning to be the initiator, instigator, and to lead with compassion.

4. TIMING--Understanding rhythm, cadence, and precise timing both in how to speak and when to speak....or not!

5. IMPROMPTU SPEAKING--Really being prepared to speak in a compelling way at any moment of need. Being here now AND having something cogent to say.

6. GOOD PLANNING--the skill to exercise good focus, organization, and productivity in all aspects of parenting and family life.

7. RELATIONSHIPS--People are what is of value in life. Relationships therefore, become paramount. It is how we develop these that defines us as individuals.

Posted by Scott Hammond at 08:31 PM | Permalink | Comments (132)

1. Consider Your Choices--what are they really? Really think about what you are choosing. Are there other unconsidered alternatives?

2. Consider the Consequences of Your Choices--What will be the probable outcomes? Can you live with that? Will the consequences be expensive?

3. Make the Best Choice--After you have done the above, make your best decision. Which is the optimum decision in the area you are facing choices?

4. Be a Class Act--Always strive to be a person of class. We are surrounded with the walking wounded who have made poor decisions and lacked real class in their choices and lives. Life is a series of decisions and choices....choose wisely!

Posted by Scott Hammond at 08:26 PM | Permalink | Comments (73)